When a couple announces their pregnancy, we all wish them the best. This is a very exciting time for both the expectant mother and her partner, and there is no better way to express your support than with the right words. However, some expectant mothers are troubled, particularly if the path to conception was difficult. Of course, congratulations are still appropriate, but we also want these mothers to feel loved and supported. Lost for words? Here are some ideas for what to say.
“Pregnancy can be unpredictable, but I’m here to listen.”
When a tiny baby is growing inside of you, even the happiest, most contented couples have their moments of self-doubt.
“Will I be able to care for my baby?”
“What if I can’t provide the emotional needs of my child when I’m such a mess myself?”
These are common fears, and telling them that they have a "little blessing" on the way can be unsettling. Venting is a healthy way to cope, and if the new mom is venting, the best thing you can do is listen. Let her know you're always available for a one-on-one rant.
“Let me know if you need guidance, books, or support groups.”
We'll probably spend a long time reading the information we gathered if we collect all the resources about pregnancy and raising a child. And, yes, pregnancy can be overwhelming, even for second, third, or fourth time moms, because each child is unique. What you SHOULD NOT do is give advice right away.
You may consider yourself an expert in pregnancy and child rearing, but the truth is that no one likes a know-it-all, even if they are correct. Being a friend to an overwhelmed pregnant woman can be difficult, but you can share what you know, such as pregnancy groups you belong to or pregnancy books you enjoyed and found useful.
“That’s big news! How do you feel about it?”
A paper was written on the importance of asking questions and doing things for a reason. To help you pay attention to details, it’s important to ask pertinent questions. When learning of a pregnancy, considering context clues can provide a lot of insight into how to respond.
No one is a mind reader, so asking the person how they feel is probably the safest thing to say. Hopefully, the person is at ease enough to express how they truly feel, whether good or bad. At the very least, they'll likely provide information about how their body is physically feeling.
“Wow! That’s a significant life change!”
Pregnancy can cause financial, housing, family dynamic, and other changes for many people. Instead of assuming that these upcoming changes are exciting for the pregnant mom, simply acknowledge them. How they respond may provide honest insight into how they feel, making it easier for you to determine where to take the conversation.
Being pregnant is overwhelming and for some women, it’s a lot to unpack! Being pregnant is challenging, and for some women, there is a lot to unpack! Of course, we always want to use the appropriate words, so if you want to offer more than a congratulatory message, stay safe and show your support for the new mom by following the suggestions above.